Ukas vits

Ukas vits #223


Q: Why did the student get upset when his teacher called him average?
A: It was a ‘mean’ thing to say!

Ukas vits

Ukas vits #222


A mathematician and his best friend, an engineer, attend a public lecture on geometry in thirteen-dimensional space. «How did you like it?» the mathematician wants to know after the talk. «My head’s spinning,» the engineer confesses. «How can you develop any intuition for thirteen-dimensional space?» «Well, it’s not even difficult. All I do is visualize the situation in n-dimensional space and then set n = 13.»

Ukas vits

Ukas vits #221


The mother of already three is pregnant with her fourth child.
One evening, the eldest child says: «Do you know what I’ve found out?»
«The new baby will be Chinese!»
«Yes. I’ve read in the paper that statistics shows that every fourth child born nowadays is Chinese…»

Ukas vits

Ukas vits #215


An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, «How odd. Scottish sheep are black.» «No, no, no!» says the physicist. «Only some Scottish sheep are black.» The mathematician rolls his eyes at his companions’ muddled thinking and says, «In Scotland, there is at least one field, containing at least one sheep, at least one side of which appears black from here.»

(And yes, I misspelled «Scotland» in the drawing – sorry!)